Side note: Don't give up on me. If you have sent me an email for a review, it will get done.

161st requested review is of Udder

Total out of 10: 8

layout etc. (2: 2)
Other than the fact that for some strange reason I've starting yearning for a tall glass of milk, the layout and theme is not that bad.

I admit it is a bit cutesy for my taste, but sometimes cutesy is allowed when the person keeps it in check.

The layout features a lot of different colors that seem to go well with one another and that is good. Sometimes when people get crazy with color the effect can be a bad one, I'm glad for her that this is not the case with her diary.

Who can go wrong with the tried and true three-column layout? It works for me and is easy to navigate. My only problem with it these days is that it can sometimes over-crowd the page when there are so many links on both sides of the writing.

This is a blog with no previous and next links, which is okay, but maybe a wee suggestion from me would be to include more than 2 entries on the main page for the reader like me that will be reading more than just that day's entry. I also think that on the left side where the links are located the archive links should come before all the other stuff since it is one of the most important links on the diary.

Another suggestion from me would be to have her take about 10 entries she feels are her best at giving details about who she is and linking to them somewhere on the blog. I say this because she has so many entries that I would really like some help in finding the most significant ones.

Annoying writing habits (2: 2)
I amazingly enough have no complaints.

Unique: (2: 1)
A woman who is this fond of breast-feeding should be called unique, so therefore she gets a point.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
"In the van on the way there, I tell Dan, 'If he speaks to me, I'm warning you, I'm gonna go all Fargo on his ass.'"

Even though I loathed the movie Fargo, I still found this line funny.

"Of course, my masseuse is male, and he's really handsome. Oh, my. I can't relax: A good-looking stranger named Brian is touching my almost-naked body! I nearly burst out laughing at the very idea."

"Lonely, abandoned by family and friends, on eggshells with Dan, sleepless, edgy, sad: Tonight, I drink a cosmopolitan, because I don't know what else to do."

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
Although her writing is very real and down to earth I would have to say that I don't think I'd be a frequent reader. It is not because she doesn't write well though; so don't misread what I am saying here. One day I may be able to relate to her more than I can now and I'll have to revisit her diary.

I think that she should have, if she already doesn't have, a very large audience of women who can read along with a smile because they know exactly what she is talking about. All and all, I'd have to say she has a very well written diary. She perhaps should do as I suggested earlier though and link to some prominent entries to help the ones like me navigate through her life easier.








posted by Eli Moose on Tuesday, August 27, 2002

160th requested review is of Flip

Side Note: This is Flip's second review on the site because the author requested reviews from both Talulah and Eli.

Rating out of 10: 7

Layout etc. (2: 2)
I like the layout. I am not sure what to call the color of the background (mauve, light purple? Not sure), but I like it. For the first few seconds, there was, in the center of the page, a large black box. Interesting, I thought, I wonder if it is meant to symbolize something -- the yawning abyss of the soul or some such. However, suddenly a picture pops into view. Ooops, once again I have made the mistake or having too much faith in the speed of my internet connection. It is a very cool picture too, of a young fellow doing a spectacular flip on a beach. I imagine the boy hitting the earth seconds later, breaking his back in four places, I giggle to myself at my macabre sense of humor, and I move on.

Easy navigation, the important links along the top, back and forth links at the beginning and end of each entry, and less important links (quizzes, other diaries and me (ahem!) at the bottom). I was tickled by the puffing dragon visitor counter, and I wouldn't have guessed the "Do ya love me?" link was an Amazon wish list since it was tucked away in the corner between the counter and the guestbook link. There is an imood icon, which I usually can't stand, since some people think that a little icon telling me their mood is more important than writing about their mood, but here it is small and inoffensive.

Every entry's title begins "The one where..." a la Friends, one of my favorite television programs, so she gets a thumbs up for that, as well as having a title that is actually meaningful. As you can imagine, I get to see to see a lot of archive pages in this job, and there is something nice about letting my eye scroll down an archive page and being able to know what the general subject matter of the entry will be. Too often people use a quote or obscure phrase for their title that is meaningful only to them. Sometimes I will still not know why they decided to call the entry what they did even after reading the entry two or three times. Now, I am not saying that titles are a huge deal; I am just saying that I like what this guy has done with his.

I read her profile(s), and honestly, they don't help me out much. I now know her favorite movies, music and other stuff, and I have read a couple of dozen of her favorite movie quotes (which do give a slight, if oblique, insight into her personality), but not much else. I was able to pick up that she is 16 from her cast list (only by reading her description of her 18 year old brother coupled with a comment that the brother is two years older than she is). Other than that, you have to go back and read through her entries to pick up any more information. To tell the truth, for the first thirty minutes of reading this, I thought the diarist was a guy.

A lot of diarists make the mistake in thinking that any one who reads their diary is either a) going to already know them, b) will make the effort to read almost everything they have written or c) doesn't care about the diarist as a person. This is not true. As a reviewer I like to know whom I am reviewing, and as a diary-surfer, I like to be able to tell within the first few minutes whether I have anything in common with the writer and thus whether I should invest the time and effort to absorb myself in their story. When I come to a diary for the first time, I am usually confronted with the latest entry. So I start reading, but I don't know anything about the writer, their situation, where they are, what they believe in or anything. It is like opening a novel at the 38th chapter or tuning into some long running daytime soap opera and being expected to be able to pick up the story immediately. Well, that is not always possible. So after being confused by the Current Entry, my next port of call is the Profile or About page. Here I expect everything to be given context. I expect to learn where the story is taking place, who is telling the story, who these people the writer is talking about are. It should be, to give a television analogy, similar to the "Previously on..." lead in to the show, telling me why so-and-so is important or whatever, and to the credits, where I can orientate who is whom and where is where.

So, to cut a long point short, I would suggest that this diarist (and most other diarists) add to their About page to give the first time reader a little more context.

Annoying Writing Habits: (2: 2)
I like her self-deprecation and I find her humor amusing. She writes well, both in the technical and creative senses. I don't see anything to fault here. Weeeeeeelllll, the one thing I didn't really like (and this is nit-picking here) is the way she breaks up some entries with a triple asterisk (***) on a new line aligned to the left. Personally, and this is probably a preference picked up from reading too many novels, but I think it would look better if the *** was center-aligned, not left aligned.

Unique: (2: 0)
Unique, well, however much I like this diary, I am sorry to say that it is not particularly unusual. While it certainly at the top of the pile, it is still on that pile. It has a pretty common design, pretty common content -- all done well (which I guess makes it different from most diaries), but all done before.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
"And for all those critics that contend that I have no emotion in my entries. Screw you. I shed a tear, man. A frickin tear. Think about it, just because a person thinks "poop stain" is a funny phrase doesn't mean that they don't have the occasional wave of emotion."

I think 'poop stain' is funny too. And I would disagree with any critic who says she has no emotion in the diary. Sure, it might not be dripping in sentimentality like some diaries, but it is definitely not cold or emotionless. Restraint and detached irony is a quality to be admired, in my book.

"And I can't even begin to explain to you how interesting I think this kid is. I would have a crush on him. I don't have crushes though. I have interests. James is MOST definately an interest."

I'll excuse the spelling error (none of us are perfect), and simply use this as an example of both the every-day-ness of this journal and the fresh way it is told.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
Yeah, I like this diary. She is clever, funny, some interesting stuff happens to her and I like the way she writes. As far as teen/high-school diaries go, this is one of the best I've seen in a while. I won't be there everyday (by its nature it is limited in scope and interest), but I will return from time to time.

posted by Eli Moose on Thursday, August 22, 2002

159th requested review is of Summer Days

Rating out of 10: 3

Layout etc. (2: 1)
Typical diaryland layout with a huge picture at the top and links scattered around. The font for the links is very small. Even worse in the archives where the dates are virtually illegible. Maybe if the color choices were different this would be easier to read but I doubt that would make a difference.

There are quite a few links, too. The top looks a little cluttered with the date and time and what she is wearing and . . . well, you get the point. There is simply too much stuff here. Do I really need to know every little detail? I don’t think so.

The picture I actually recognize. Surprising, isn’t it? It’s from a television program. (Very surprising given my total lack of television literacy.) Black background with light blue font is okay. Not sure why the font in the text of the entry doesn’t match the font for the links, etc. This is a little disorienting. I would prefer for the font to be consistent throughout. The links work which is something. Do they open in a separate window? Nope. (Invitation to all journal writers: If you wish to know how this can be done, please email me and I will happily share the html tag with you. It isn’t that hard!)

So one point for general appearance. But points off for things like poorly labeled links. A person unfamiliar with diaryland might not realize that “rags | riches” is actually a “cute” way of saying “previous | next.” Don’t assume a person reading your journal is familiar with diaryland. You would be surprised by the ignorance of people on the internet.

Annoying Writing Habits: (2: 0)
Emoticons aside, she uses a lot of parenthetical asides. Too many, frankly. Dashes are abused instead of the usual ellipses. And is it necessary to repeat etc.? The only time she doesn’t have parenthetical remarks or smiley faces is when the entry is either too short or cluttered up with quiz results. At least there aren’t quiz results in each and every post. Still, she has a long way to go to have a writing style that is easier to read and the quiz results should be relegated to another place.

Unique: (2: 1)
The journal itself is not especially unique but I did like one little thing. If you click on the link for scribblings you will find a collection of her writings. Everything from poetry to short stories to essays. These are actually links to journal entries in which she shared her personal writing. I only wish she did this with other things like the “song list” and the “I list.” Maybe have a link that is for the banal surveys like the one created for the poetry and essays, etc. There really isn’t a need for so many links when you can easily combine them.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
“Interesting highlight of the evening: sitting at Friendly's and having this kid in a red shirt walking past the window at our booth and pretending to be a mime. So I pretended to be one in return. He walks off. And then returns later with his "posse." Waves. Does the "call me/I'll call ya" thing. Walks off. Returns. Walks off.”

I must be easily amused because reading about this actually made me smile. Which is a good thing

“I am the first Asian American in my family tree and soon-to-be the first to ever take the SAT’s and go to an American college. I am one of the few in my lineage interested in art, theater, music, dance, and literature. My life has had its ups and downs; I’ve won awards and contests, but lost friends, and almost a sister, to the “Angel of Death.” I write in my journal to mark these monumental occasions, my feelings, and my thoughts for myself and others to come.”

Seems a good enough reason for someone to keep a journal. Unfortunately, she doesn't really dig into this potential very much.

“I also ripped the skin off my middle finger on my left hand. It really hurts. I fell whilst trying to carry the canoe. "Port it" over a dam. Ahem. Let's just say I'm, uh, not very strong. :\”

I would have liked to have read more about the kayaking but she left very little information about this trip except that it was “much fun.” Doesn’t make for much fun in reading, however.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 0)
Probably not. It isn’t that the journal is uninteresting. There just wasn’t anything that really pulled me into this girl’s life. I would want more intimacy, more in depth exploration of her emotions, her desires, her passions. When I left from reading the journal I felt I knew so little about her, really. Based on her first entry, there is potentially much she could and should be sharing. I may have overlooked the truly emotional entries but most people won’t read each and every entry so if you can’t inspire a person to read with nearly every entry you can’t expect many people to keep coming back to read.

posted by Talulah Lamb on Wednesday, August 21, 2002

158th requested review is of requested review is of Musings of a Mad Woman

Total out of 10: 3

layout etc. (2: 0)
I almost flatly refused to review this diary upon first glance, but a part of me hopes that she will filter through the biting comments I have to make and grow from this experience.

There are so many things wrong with this thing that I hope I can cover them all. First of all, I wonder why someone with a diary titled, "Musings of a Mad Woman," would think that pictures of Hello Kitty would be appropriate for her diary, it makes me wonder if she really is "mad"; I'm not sure that is what she wants to convey. It doesn't make any sense.

I'm not against Hello Kitty as a theme for a diary layout, but I'm not impressed with this one at all. The pinks do not match. It looks like she randomly choose different shades of pink because they were pink. All pink colors are not alike and do not look good together. This layout has way too many colors on it if you ask me.

I really do not like busy backgrounds behind text, if she felt she just had to use the Hello Kitty background, I'd suggest it be behind the main part of the layout and not the text. Leave the text area as clean and easy to read as possible so that the reader's eyes are not crossed while reading your diary. I would also suggest another font, but that is purely based on my reading preference.

The top line where the title is constantly moving may look cool the first time, but seeing it up there is a big distraction. I hope that as she grows in layout and design that she gets past those neat little tricks offered by FrontPage. I also think that the links with all the borders around them make the page look extremely cluttered.

Right now I am on the "who I am" page and I don't see a way to the archive of the diary, or a back to the current entry. I think that they are the most important links of all and they are left off for some reason. I found the link called "most recent" down the page quite a ways and it didn't work.

[inserted comment] You'll have to excuse me for not knowing that the "where I was," link led to the archive of the diary. I've said this before and this proves my point that unclearly marked diary links do not lead to promising readers. It doesn't change my opinion about the layout though.

I found the archives on the "book reviews" page, but then I saw something scrolling up the bottom of the page. What in the hell is that all about? Every page loads differently as well, sometimes the links on the side margin are at the top; sometimes they are at the bottom. The four most important links a diary has are neglected here, they are: previous and next (should be at the top and bottom), archives (found it on a random page), and the current entry link (which didn't always work).

Annoying writing habits (2: 1)
She randomly writes poetry for entries, and has a love of surveys that I just do not understand. I hate surveys. I suggest a different diary for her poems and her surveys; also some of her writing prompts are just silly.

Unique: (2: 0)
Not that I could find.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
"I remember one time when I was 19. I was in a huge fight with my boyfriend, and took a knife and cut my arms until they were dripping blood. I then left the apartment, walking around the streets with the blood still oozing from my cuts. My boyfriend sent the police after me, and they took me by ambulance to the hospital. When I spoke to the psychologist there, he wrote the incident off as a mere power struggle between my boyfriend and I, had the doctors bandage me up, and sent me along on my merry way."

"Every week starts out with the best of intentions, with the commitment to get back on the path to health. I seem unable to follow through on the promises I have made myself, and end up binging by the end of the day Tuesday, or Wednesday at the latest. I need help. I need divine guidance to help me through this."

"Take one of the article ideas you brainstormed yesterday and expand it into a rough draft.
Again I will be skipping this one since I don't write magazine articles."

This was an entire entry. Why couldn't she just not write that day?"

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
Although I wouldn't go back to read more, I still feel that she deserves a point here because she does often bare herself in her writing. I feel that it is a great attribute that she has in her ability to be honest in her writing. With some major improvements in her layout and overall style, she could have a very good diary on her hands.




posted by Eli Moose on Tuesday, August 13, 2002

I have to apologize to my readers; yes I am still here, and yes I am still doing reviews. Unfortunately for the moment I am living a rather hectic life and can only get reviews done in spurts. I really appreciate the audience that I have and the requests that keep pouring in. I plan to get to them as soon as possible. In the near future the reviews will be more consistent, please be patient with me.

Right now for your reading enjoyment I am going to do something almost unheard of from me in a while, an un-requested review. I think you'll enjoy it. Think of it as my thank you gift to all of you for continuing to read.

157th unrequested review is of Beans for Breakfast

Rating out of 10: 10

layout etc. (2: 2)
In one of my late night searches through web page after web page I stumbled across this diary. At that time the design was slightly different, but nonetheless it drew my attention.

The layout is rather neat and definitely attractive. The colors suit the person I believe and do not look overly feminine, or masculine. The photograph with its aged colorization compliments it as well. It is a well thought out, well put together design.

I like the comment section, it rules out any need for the overused guest-book. I am personally a little sick of guest-books although I succumb to the use of one myself. He includes a lot of links and the occasional photograph in his entries that also add to the look of the diary.

Everything worked and everything was where it should be. There was nothing that didn't function, nor was there anything unbecoming at all about the diary. Nothing stung my eyes here; in fact it is a clean, beautiful diary.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 2)
A perfect score here folks because he just doesn't annoy me.

Unique: (2: 2)
I began following the diary on a regular basis, checking every now and then to see if there were new entries. One entry about the the card collector held my attention for quite a while, following all the entries written about this one particular person in Jeff (the author's) life.

I found it very helpful the way he chronicles his relationship with Robert by having a link to all the entries that involve him. I can tell that it is something that is constantly on his mind since there are a lot of Robert related entries.

Quotes from the Diary: (2: 2)
"Ingrid and I hadn't had one of those difficult frank discussion in awhile - the kind where I, stubbornly but honestly, had trouble understanding how everything had reached such a straining point. Instead of forgetting about them, I guess I should have wondered why it had been so long since we'd had one."

Here is where I think he could have delved into his emotions a little more to share with his readers.

"At Vivace, a girl my age sits with a large 64 piece box of crayons (not Crayola) in front of her - the size box that makes little kids jealous of each other. I keep turning to look at her, she looks like an acquaintance, but I have more of a back view than a profile view, so I can't tell if it's her. When I get up to leave, I take a good look, & it's not my friend. But it is a 20sish person sitting in a coffee shop, drinking hot cocoa & eating a banana (or at least carrying a banana around), filling in her coloring book. And that's within the range of eccentricity that I find admiral."

"So over the last couple of years he's been coming up to me and asking if I have any cards, pictures, slides, or anything for him. I always tell him no and then we'll walk a little and he'll tell me a convoluted story about finding a box of slides in a dumpster or about someone giving him their expired passport."

One about the card collector.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 2)
Yes, I indeed do go back to read his diary on an almost daily basis. It is one of those things that I do before disconnecting from the internet and going to sleep. It isn't really that he writes the most interesting diary I've ever read, but it is the whole package that he provides.

He writes in a way that makes me want to know more, and I go back hoping that with each new entry that I will learn something new about him.

If there is any one thing that I can say he is lacking, that would be more emotion-filled entries. His diaries that contain information about something that involves a lot of feeling tend to be rather short and I can tell he is holding back.

There you have a well deserved perfect score.



posted by Eli Moose on Sunday, August 11, 2002

156th requested review is of Dreamdust

Rating out of 10: 1

Layout etc. (2: 1)
The first page is so cluttered with stuff that one doesn’t even know where to begin. There is a calendar list of birthdays and such which includes important dates that have already passed and are therefore crossed out. I would suggest that if you are going to take the time to update them when they are past, you could just as easily remove them.

Remove them and about thirty or forty other things on this page. Scrolling quotes, quotes from lyrics, mood icons (which don’t even work), links to other sites. A message board. A counter. A poll. I mean it, if you can’t find it on the first page it isn’t because it isn’t there—it is because everything else is there too. This is simply too much stuff in the midst of everything else.

I didn’t even know I had read the journal entry. Unfortunately because the first entry I read was more a list of facts bracketed with single sentence remarks, I didn’t even know it was a journal entry. I thought it was just one more piece of information cluttered in with all the rest of the stuff. (Since writing the above the journal portion of the page is given more physical space than the rest but that doesn't change the fact that there is simply too much clutter.)

This page is simply to busy to be reader friendly. The very fact that the journal entry is relegated to a narrow column suggests that even the writer doesn’t give the journal much significance over all. Is this a journal or a dumping ground for everything else? It isn’t clear.

I am giving her one point because it is obvious this girl knows her stuff. What she doesn’t seem to know is that less is more. Get rid of about 75% of this stuff and you might have a decent, and readable page!

Annoying Writing Habits: (2: 0)
Misspellings abound. I can almost forgive a misspelled word in an entry. Everyone misspells something occasionally. But to have misspelled words in nearly every entry and the content of the page itself is insulting the person who is reading your journal. I have said before that if the writer doesn’t care enough about the reader to be careful with their writing then why should anyone bother to read? And you don’t have to worry. Usually, if you don’t know how to spell nobody is going to plagiarize you letter for letter anyway.

Unique: (2: 0)
If you find the layout unique I suppose that could qualify but the content of the journal itself is not unique at all. To be ranting about Alanis Morissette’s song Ironic years after the fact that everyone and their mother has already said that the song is mis-titled is redundant bordering on uninteresting. Besides, if you are going to judge others for their inability to use a dictionary you might want to remember that people use dictionaries to check the spelling of words before writing them. She writes a goodbye saying she will be going on a camping trip and then doesn’t bother to tell you what happened on the trip itself. The cast list is not especially interesting or enlightening and is also full of spelling and grammar errors. I don’t think I found anywhere that didn’t have some sort of glaring error that could have easily been corrected.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 0)
“Yea... But you can't really blame a person for trying, huh? Hey, you think now that she's a famous bajillionaire, maybe she could afford to by herself a dictionary?”

Here is a bit about the rant on Alanis. So let us begin. If you must use ellipses there should be a space between each period. Also it is “buy” not “by.” You can look that up in a dictionary to verify this.

“Kyla Cordero~ She's a fellow superfriend! A year younger than me but I think of her as one of my most special friends. She sweet and all, I love her.”

An example from the cast list page. Again, spelling and grammar errors in a page that is permanent is really unforgivable. Sorry but that just annoys me.

“It's funny how completely confident I seem, and everyone still has yet to figure out that I am really hiding in dark shadows of insecurity. But hey, you know I wouldn't have it any other way. I like to keep 'em guessing. ::Winks::”

She doesn’t seem confident to me in her journal. Nor do I read anything that digs into the dark shadows. Basically this is a fluff piece meant to entertain or distract, I am not sure. But hey! No misspelled words, unless you count the intentional use of “’em.” And I hate the ::Winks::--but I have said as much before.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 0)
Too much would have to change for me to say that I would. Of course, there may be more to this girl’s journal and life than is on the page—although, given the layout one would have to marvel at what else could possibly fit into her life. She apparently has a password protected journal and since she did not send me the password, I was unable to explore further than what she shared. Thus, the review can only be based on what she chose to share. What she chose wasn’t particularly intriguing or interesting. (Also, although she labels her pictures "My Uglyness" this girl is adorable. Not sure whether she is trying to buy into the typical teenaged low self-esteem or is mocking the reader.)

posted by Talulah Lamb on Sunday, August 11, 2002

155th requested review is of Flip

Rating out of 10: 6

Layout etc. (2: 1)
Not much remarkable here. It is a typical diaryland layout. The image is nice. Not sure what it signifies. Perhaps there was an explanation I missed in reading the archives. I like the colors used. The font is fine. Nothing remarkable one way or the other. Not remarkably great or remarkably bad. Sort of banal, really.

I do find the abundance of links at the bottom a bit annoying but they are not obtrusive. The links don’t open in a separate window. And some of the links are redundant. Still, the journal layout is acceptable because it is so basic. So no points gained for creativity or superlative navigation but none lost for clutter or annoying colors, etc.

Annoying Writing Habits: (2: 1)
None really. There are a few grammatical errors which are rather glaring. Not too often but often enough that I cringed a few times so one point lost for that but the more this person writes and reads, the more likely these errors will fade away.

Unique: (2: 1)
The style of writing is not remarkably unique and yet, every now and again, the writer makes an observation or comment that is unusual. I found myself smiling every now and then at the things that were in the journal. There are moments where this writer’s personality simply sparkle from the lines and although those moments are not in each and every entry they are there often enough to give one point for being unique

Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
“I can wash them. But believe me, one go through the wash and my mother will find some way to fuck up the perfection that is my sweatpants.”

Not sure I understand this. When I wash my clothes, my mother has nothing to do with it because I am washing them. If she can find some way of fucking up the perfection of my sweatpants then I would have to say that I am not washing them. Maybe I am missing something very obvious here.

“When did the human race decide that public school was the appropriate approach to teaching children? Why can't change be accepted? Will we still resort to such a mediocre method of learning ten years from now? My children certainly won't. Because when I have children, I will either teach them myself or I will put them in the most free of all Montesorri schools.”

There are times when the inexperienced and opinionated voice of youth can be annoying but this is not the case with this writer. I am not saying that an older reader won’t wonder at the naiveté in what they read but the writer has a way of saying it that isn’t off-putting or overly self-righteous.

Only two quotes, I know. I did find the entry about magnetic poetry oddly amusing. And the scrolling reminder to post in the guestbook with its idle threat also amuses me.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
Yes. Although I refuse to sign the guestbook, I am likely to return for a peek into this young person’s life. I would like to read more deep thoughts but the random observations are entertaining and not all journals have to be painfully intimate. This one meets somewhere in the middle. Not just meant to entertain but also not full of raw emotions.

posted by Talulah Lamb on Saturday, August 10, 2002